Stage 2 Triggers
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Meeting ID: 81946533721 Passcode: steps123
Call into this meeting by phone at (346) 248-7799, meeting ID 81946533721, passcode 32858808#
One tap mobile: +16699009128,,81946533721#,,,,*32858808#
Other phone numbers (including outside the USA) are available here.
1. Introduction “Good day, my name is _____ and I will be your moderator today. Welcome to this VA Step 1,2,3 Waltz Meeting for Steps 1, 2 and 3. This meeting is for persons who have been victims, persecutors and/or rescuers in the cycle of violence.”
2. Serenity prayer “Will all who care to please join in the Serenity prayer?”
“God grant me serenity to accept the things I cannot change, courage to change the things I can, and wisdom to know the difference.”
“You may mute and unmute yourself with the microphone button on your screen or * 6 on your phone. If you are not sharing, please make sure that you are muted.”
3. Read (or ask a volunteer to) the Preamble for Violence Anonymous
4. Read or ask a Volunteer to read: A word to newcomers (it’s on the Resources page too)
5. Read The VA 12 Steps (or ask for a volunteer)
6. Member Introduction (At 5 past the hour) “At this time we introduce ourselves by first name only. This is not to embarrass you, but to get to know you.”
7. Weekly Topic / Reading (from our book And So We Begin, a PDF of Steps 1-3 is available from the meeting host)
Step 2 – Read pages 54-55 (Stage 2 Triggers)
8. Writing Time (10 minutes total with a 2-minute warning)
Write on Triggers & Effects (p 55) & Thoughts & Beliefs (p 56)
If someone joins the meeting during this portion, let them know that the group is writing and what the topic is.
9. Sharing (Until 45 past the hour)
“Would someone be willing to be our timekeeper?” (Each Share is 3 minutes total with a 1-minute warning.)
“Now is the time to share our writing with the group. We ask that there be no cross talk – which means that we keep the focus on ourselves, address our remarks to the group and not to any individual. Please refrain from making remarks during another person’s share, and save questions and comments for after the meeting. Explicit descriptions of violence and/or violent fantasies can be triggering to other members of the meeting. When sharing about violent fantasies, we put our focus on our powerlessness over the fantasy and the feelings that trigger the belief of victimhood. If we get upset by what is shared we take responsibility for the feeling, and use the tools of VA to process the trigger and regain a neutral state of mind. Shares are 3 minutes in length. Please acknowledge that you have heard the time keeper give the one minute warning and the word “time” at the end of your share. You may mute and unmute yourself with the microphone button on your screen or * 6 on your phone. If you are not sharing, please make sure that you are muted. Who is willing to share first?”
10. More Reading: Read pages 56-58 (Tools to use for Stage 2 Triggers – Belly Breathing & Reframing)
11. 7th Tradition (At 5 minutes before the close of the meeting)
“Our 7th Tradition states that every VA group ought to be fully self-supporting, declining outside contributions. We pass a virtual basket and ask that you give what you can. The funds are used to pay the expenses of the fellowship. Contributions may be made on the 7th Tradition page on violenceanonymous.org. We’ll now give time for those who wish to make a contribution to find that page. Know that if you can’t give now, your presence is more important than your money. (Pause)”
12. Contact Requests “Now is the time for contact (phone #, email, WhatsApp) requests. Please state whose contact info you would like and we will exchange info after the closing of the meeting. Info may also be shared directly in the chat.”
13. Announcements “Now is the time for both VA and non-VA announcements.
“First are there any VA announcements that affect this meeting or VA as a whole?
“Are there any non-VA announcements about tools or outside resources that pertain to VA recovery?”
14. Closing “The opinions expressed here were strictly those of the person who gave them. Take what you like and leave the rest. The things you heard were spoken in confidence and should be treated as confidential. Keep them within the walls of this room. Talk to each other, reason things out with someone else, but let there be no gossip or criticism of one another. Instead, let the understanding, love, and peace of the program grow in you one day at a time. The room will remain open after the meeting for fellowship. Will all who care to join me in the serenity prayer?”
“God grant me serenity to accept the things I cannot change, courage to change the things I can, and wisdom to know the difference.”
15. Contact Exchange and Fellowship Those persons whose contact info was requested can be shared now. We would like to encourage anyone who did not have an opportunity to share during the meeting to do so now. Also, if anyone has questions about the program this is an opportunity to ask them. Please keep your shares to about 3 minutes. The parking lot is open for fellowship.